What do you want by having this?
Sometimes we can't get what we want until we think of what we would ultimately get by having what we want.
This can allow us to find other, effective ways of achieving our desires.
So you might want a Rolls Royce to drive but if it's really the smell of leather seats that makes you feel rich, a feeling you really like, then perhaps a cheaper car with leather seats might meet your emotional needs even if you aren't rich.
Another example might be going for a particular job because it's an outdoors job. Even if you don't get that particular position there are still other jobs that are outdoors.
You may not be able to get a painting job but perhaps a park ranger position would work instead.
The principle is: if you're not getting what you want, then maybe you can still get what you wanted out of that goal another way.
If you know what you'll have from getting the goal that makes that goal so appealing then you can be on the alert for other ways of getting it.